Rebecca reflecting on how much she has learned

Today was the second to last day of my internship.  My teacher is actually going away with about half the students to a leadership camp, so it was the last day I was able to see all my students, and be in the classroom with my teacher.  I’m actually writing this blog as we all wait for the bus to come get us and bring us home.  I can’t believe that I was here for a whole three and half months! I feel like the time I spent here, at Christel House, went by way too fast.  I have made such strong connections with my students.  They’ve made me laugh and cry.  One student today said, “You’ve become part of the family: part of the Christel House Family.”  I was so touched by that one simple phrase that was said as casually as you can imagine: As if it was an unquestionable fact.   I could only smile, I was so speechless. I haven’t felt like an outsider since my first week.

My first week was actually difficult for me.  I’m the type of person who thrives on routine, order, and control.  When I walked into Christel House, I didn’t know what classroom I would be placed in, what I was supposed to do, or where to go.  Even not knowing where to eat my lunch really bothered me.  I felt so uncomfortable and out of place, simply because I felt really lost.  The next two days went in a similar manner.  Then things took a huge turn the next week.  I was in the same classroom for multiple days, I was getting a hang of the schedule, and I connected with the students.  Ever since then, I couldn’t imagine being placed at any other internship (thanks Vernon and Marita!). 

Throughout the entire day I’ve been trying not to break down in tears. I actually had to leave the classroom at one point because I just felt so overwhelmed by my feelings.   I knew that I would be upset, but this is different.  I resigned myself to the fact that I would leaving in the middle of the school year a long time ago, but now I’m having trouble with the fact that for a lot of the students, I may never talk to them again.  I won’t have to answer a hundred questions about my life, nor will I get to ask them thousands of questions about theirs.  Each one of them was a huge part of my Cape Town experience, and I learned as much from them as they may have learned from me.  I hope whoever reads this doesn’t feel bad for me because I’m leaving, but instead is happy that I feel so strongly about these students.  Christel House, and UCONN to Cape Town put me in a situation where there were no expectations for me.  I was able to make this experience what I wanted, and it was.  I got to observe, and assist an amazing teacher all semester.   Being an assistant in class allowed me the opportunity to get to really know the students. 

Christel house’s principal today told me that he enjoyed how I was always sitting and interacting with the students.  It was hard at first to put myself out there and start conversations with the learners, but soon it became second nature.  I would eat my lunch either really quickly or outside, so I could talk to them, and spent interval (tea time, or break) with the students also.  I won’t lie most of the students are closer in age to me, which was always interesting haha.  Some of the students shared stories with me that left me speechless because I couldn’t believe that people their age had experienced certain things, and even off hand comments would sometimes freeze me in my tracks.  They have been through more than most adults at home have, and they still have smiles on their faces (I mean they don’t smile all the time, they are at school haha). Yet most of the time I’m struck by how similar we all are.  In high school we all have crushes, problems, tests, arguments with teachers, etc.

I sit here as a person with her lap top, iPod in ears, a cell phone in my bag, now appreciating how lucky I am to have these things. I also sit here with clothes on my back, more clothes at home, food to eat, books to read, a hot shower waiting, electricity, a family of 17 students down the road, a loving family made of my mom, dad, Alexa, cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents, a safe home, a place where I can walk around all the time and never feel endangered..  Some of these things I’ve always known I was lucky to have, but being in Cape Town has shown me the mass amounts of people who don’t have those things.  I can’t believe how much I have learned, and I will always remember Christel House.